I Will Not Give My Blessing

For the past three months I have been struggling with whether or not I should continue to give the Mormon church my support. With a son currently on a mission and another son getting ready to come of age, it is a problem that I need to come to grips with.

When Willie, Rarit, and Richard passed away, Jonathan did not leave his mission to come home to their funeral. His first response to me when I asked him if he was coming home, was that "they don't like us to leave our mission". Although I can certainly understand the need to stay focused on the task at hand, it would seem to me that under circumstances such as these, the church would not only "allow" a missionary to come home, but would encourage it. Or, indeed, should demand that they go home and be with their family. The deaths of three close family members is not an insignificant matter. The fact that the church would leave it to the individual missionary to decide, with an implicit (or perhaps explicit) message that he should not interrupt his mission, is simply beyond belief to me. The message that this sends is that one's family is less important than the business of proselytizing. If this is indeed the opinion of the Mormon church, then I shall have nothing to do with it anymore.

I am not going to hold it against Jonathan for not returning home for the funerals. I wish that he had made a different decision and I believe, in time, he will wish that he had chosen to attend the funerals, as well. However, as a young missionary who is fully enveloped in the spirit of his calling, he needs to rely on the sage advice of his church leaders. In this case, they failed him.

At the moment, I don't recall if I will be asked for my concurrence for Sean going on his mission. I simply don't remember if that was something that I was asked to agree to with Willie or Jonathan. I believe that I was asked for my concurrence, at least for Willie. However, I will not give them my blessing for Sean. I don't see how I can support an organization who would not insist on a child returning home to attend the funeral of his brother and his brother's family.