Almost a year

It has almost been 1 year since Willie, Rarit, and Richard died. Jonathan and I viewed the DVD of the funeral service yesterday. It was like it had just happened. I am sure the pain will never go away. I still think about them everyday, especially when I'm in the car.

I wish I had planned things better. I really wanted to go visit the grave site on the 17th. I need to plan a trip there soon. Perhaps I'll make a detour through Camarillo on my next trip to CA.

I miss them so much.

Back online

I'm back. It's been quite awhile since my last post. I'm now settled in Virginia.

Another Sad Day

I went to Camarillo this past weekend to visit the cemetary. They had finally got the grave marker in place, so I wanted to see how it looked. Although it looked nice, I discovered that they had Rarit's birth date wrong. Jude called them and they agreed that they would correct the mistake. That will probably take a couple of months.

It was very difficult for me to visit the grave site. I miss them all so much and feel so absolutely lost and empty with them gone. This is the worst feeling that anyone could possibly have. I love them so much. They were such wonderful people.

Just another day in the park

You talk about feast or famine. I go along for months without hearing anything serious from anyone, then all of a sudden the phone is ringing off the hook, so to speak. I've heard from 4 different folks in the last couple of weeks regarding potential opportunities. It seems like as soon as the Xetron thing dried up, then several other things popped up. The most promising looks to be a position with EDO Corporation supporting the Marine Corps Warfighting Lab. I'm not sure how they ever became aware of me, but somehow they did and we've been talking. While visiting them, I met with an old friend and he indicates that he might have something for me. Then today I get a call from a guy regarding a position with Sierra Nevada Corp. I'm not sure if this position is here or in Sparks, NV. And finally, I get an email from another recruiter checking to see if I'm still in the market. This guy and the guy representing SNC apparently know each other.

So, we'll see what happens. I've been through this a few times, enough to realize that nothing is final until the fat lady signs an offer letter.

Fired Up

I rarely get so fired up that I respond in writing to some of the "idiots" of this world. However, today I got fired up. I received an email suggesting that everyone wear red on Fridays to show support for the troops. I get things like this all the time and, for the most part, ignore them. However, one of the other people who this email was sent to felt the need to reply. I will post this fellow's reply and then my response to him below.

First, the reply that set me off -

To All:

"Support our troops" - a deceitful SLOGAN - created by the same very organized MONSTERS who are waging the immoral war in Iraq. And they bolster their slogan with well crafted cliches, designed to raise emotion such that they can short-circuit thought:

- slient majority
- love for God and country
- the boisterous "liberal"
- solidarity, dignity, and respect
- "red-blooded" Americans!
- a home coming football game

[who are they appealing to here? This is not a game people! what is going on is death and destruction, and maiming, and suffering!]

Those that began this war used skillfull contrivances to generate support, and they continue in attempts to have us say that we want them to do it! What is going on is HORRIFIC!!! Please don't help their effort to continue war.

Sincerely,
John Vincent

And, now here's my response -

John,

You could not be more wrong. There is nothing deceitful about wanting to support the American troops who are serving our country. There is nothing immoral about wanting to eliminate an organization who has vowed to destroy us and our way of life. You may not believe that the former Iraqi leadership had this in mind, but you are wrong. You may not believe that they had been supporting terrorist organizations against our country, but you are wrong. You may not believe that they ever had caches or biological and chemical weapons which could have, and would have, been used against us, but you are wrong.

Can I assume that the "monsters" you refer to are the animals who capture innocent civilians and video tape their beheading? Can I assume that the "monsters" you refer to are the people who drive a van up to a group of men looking for work and then detonate a bomb, causing untold amounts of death, destruction, maiming, and suffering. Yes, they are monsters and it is those very people who our troops are trying to keep from coming here to carryout those monsterous acts. Yet, you believe that those running our country are monsters. You believe our country's leadership is the source of evil in this world.

You disgust me. Not because you believe this war is immoral and unjust, but because you, and so many others like you, continue to reap the benefits that this great country has to offer while at the same time blaming us for all the evil in this world. It is the likes of you that emboldens the terrorists to continue their attacks on us. Through you they see weakness and through weakness they see success.

You are right about one thing. War is horrific. However, flying two commerical airliners into the World Trade Center is horrific. Flying a commercial airliner into the Pentagon is horrific. Driving a bomb-laden truck into a barracks full of U.S. Marines is horrific. Defending our country against
such actions is not horrific. It is what we must do. And to show support for those who will defend our country is what I will proudly do.

September 9th

Today is Richard's birthday. I believe he would have been 8. I should know for sure. Although he is gone, I see his smiling face around our house everyday in Nicole's smile. They are so much alike. I miss you, Richard.

Failed Response

The Wall Street Journal has published an excellent article on the failure of the Mayor of New Orleans and the Governor of Louisiana to fulfill their duties regarding Hurricane Katrina. I doubt that you will see the Democratic leadership nor the MSM point out these failures.

The Welfare State

This article from the Intellectual Activist states, in much better terms, the point I was making in my previous posting. I think he's hit the nail on the head.

New Orleans

Depending on what you read and what you believe, things could be a real mess in New Orleans. The city is full of poor, ignorant people who don't know what to do. They are standing around, wandering around, waiting for the "government" to tell them what to do. And, they're mad because there isn't someone from the government standing on every street corner providing them with guidance and direction. How is it that we've gotten to a point in this country where people cannot think on their own and cannot muster the wherewithall to take care of themselves? My understanding is that on the other side of the broken levee (around Metarie) the land is dry and thus there is probably clean drinking water, showers, etc. It must be like you would imagine life after a nuclear attack. No order. Complete chaos and lawlessness.

Vacation?

I returned from a week out of state last Tuesday. Although a good portion of the time was supposed to be a vacation, it seemed anything but. I wanted to have the entire time to do whatever, but people wanted to set schedules, etc. I did enjoy a nice round of golf at Wetherington CC. I tied my career low round with a 67...not bad for a course I've never seen. I was very disappointed in the hotels that we stayed at. Although they were supposed to be 3 - 3.5 stars, I didn't care for them. I was especially disappointed in the Cleveland Airport Marriott. I was hoping to see a lot more houses in the Cincinnati area, but only got to spend a few hours on Sunday looking. I didn't have a good idea of where the open houses were, so it turned out to be a lot of wasted time. Next time, I've got to go by myself and schedule a lot more golf.

Losing It

Things are really starting to get to me. Perhaps it's because we have a house full of people and there are so many competing demands. Perhaps it's the stress of dealing with the loss of Willie, Rarit, and Richard. Perhaps it's the uncertainty of Recom's future. But, whatever the reason, I'm finding it more and more difficult to deal with the constant and continuous problems that come up. I'm simply getting tired of hearing nothing but complaining, whether it's Sean computer-playing or Jennifer's rearranging the house, or Jessica's dental problems. I am going to have to the computer away from Sean forever. I just called Sean and let him know. Of course, he's not happy. But, I don't care. It's become the source of too much frustration to allow him to continue to live on it.

I need some serious time away from the house, family, and work.

I miss you, Willie

I am really feeling bad today. It just came on me all of a sudden. I was reading about a man who went to Camp Lejeune to welcome his son's battalion home. He son was in that battalion but had been killed in Iraq. The article talked of the Marines coming up to this man one at a time and expressing their thoughts about his son. It reminded me so much of Willie's funeral. I haven't cried like this for a couple of months.

I miss you, Willie.

Is the State Culpable

About a month after the traffic accident, I went to the scene to better understand how the accident might have occurred. The accident report from the Highway Patrol didn't give me the understanding that I needed.

Sean and I drove the route that Rarit would have been driving. We were entering the Northbound I-5 ramp at about 5:15 which would have been two hours earlier than when Rarit would have entered. The sun was directly above the sun visor and directly on line with the direction I was heading into the on-ramp. I saw no sign indicating that the on-ramp was about to make a sharp right-hand turn. I saw no speed limit sign.

It was very easy to see what might have happened. Rarit entered the northbound on-ramp from west-bound Magic Mountain Parkway. She was probably traveling at 40-50 mph when she entered the on-ramp. The ramp was really just a slight right-hand veer from Magic Mountain Parkway. About 100 yards (or less) into the on-ramp, the road turns sharply (80-90 degrees) to the right. Rarit would not have seen this if she were struggling with the sun in her eyes. And, since she had not driven this route before would not have known that the road would be turning. When she realized that the road was turning she obviously turned hard to the right in order to avoid going over a slight bern and directly onto I-5. When she made the hard right-hand turn, she turned too far and now faced a concrete barrier that she then had to make a hard left-hand turn to avoid. This then put her back in the same direction as before which was almost perpendicular to the freeway. However, at this point she was right on the left hand side of the freeway. And unfortunately, there was no time for her to stop before entering into the traffice lanes.

It seems to me that the design and layout of this on-ramp was the primary cause of the accident. Yes, if Rarit had been driving slower she might have been able to stop short of the freeway. However, I didn't see anything at this on-ramp that would have made her think that she needed to be traveling less than 30 mph. There was no warning that the on-ramp had a sharp turn on it.

I wonder who I should talk to, to see if there is anything I can do to prevent this from happening again. I wonder if it has happened in the past.